The Circle of Life

As life would have it, all things are the same and there is nothing new under the sun! Ecclesiastes 1:9 reminded me of this very statement written only the way God can illustrate: “The thing that hath been, it is that which shall be; and that which is done is that which shall be done; and there is no new thing under the sun.”

Several months have passed since my last blog and a lot of things has taken place both in the world and in my life as well. I have experience some happy days and many sad days. I have had some failures throughout the months and some successes. I made some progress on various goals and projects as I have endured some setbacks. I have even grieved the tragedy loss of my stepson from a brutal shooting and I had the amazing joy of the birth of a beautiful step granddaughter. So many things to cause me to lose focus by giving up on some of my midlife dreams and throwing away that little chip of mustard seed faith I have been holding on for dear life, I mean forever!

The media has been overwhelmingly bombarded with the turmoil of domestic abuse, senseless killings, homelessness and people everywhere who are economically deprived nothing new, right? You are right, but what makes this time more noticeable or unavoidable than other times or these times greater than the past, I ask? I woke up with this on my mind probably because it is what I went to sleep with or should I say did not sleep at all because of the very things that were lurking on my mind.

Was it because of how my enemy disguised as a love one who vowed to love and protect me, but finds a way at every awaking moment to tear me down and attempt to destroy everything I worked hard to own, overcome and break through? Or perhaps another family member who would say negative things about me to another, Go figure. Knocking at the door of the fall time of my life where I had planned to enjoy my special moments in time, that is, my each and every moment in time. I want to savor or experience that distinctive quality only that unique instant provides. Albeit, Grandchildren, Family, Travel, Writing, Exploring and Engaging in Creative Endeavors where ever that may lead. Here I am, yet again feeling the uneasiness of these dooms feelings of abuse attempting to raise its ugly head again in my life, nothing new. Oh no, not the physical abuse again if that is what you may be thinking, Lord’s forbids!

However, there are many other subtle yet obvious ways abuse have a way of slipping into one’s life. Yeah, It’s in the book; it is in the book and will take me off topic here! Nevertheless, what I experienced an evening, not long ago that interrupted my sleep was something ah so familiar, nothing new by no means under the sun. I was feeling unloved, disrespected, insulted, unappreciated and yes figuratively speaking abused and no matter how it is dressed up or masked, it is still abuse. One thing for sure being an Author, Survivor, Mentor and Advocate on the subject, I know and have lived with domestic abuse and domestic violence.

I must admit and give credit to Elton John and Tim Rice for this beautiful song the “Circle of Life” In the Lion King of the reflective lyrics and it’s insightful impact:
“From the day we arrive on the plant and blinking, step into the sun there’s more to see than can ever be seen, more to do than can ever be done, there’s far too much to take in here more to find than can ever be found but the sun rolling high through the sapphire sky, keeps great and small on the endless round.
It’s the Circle of Life and it moves us all through despair and hope through faith and love till we find our place on the path unwinding in the Circle the Circle of Life”—

However, The Ultimate Credit must be given at all time to God for His Saving Grace, His Mercy, His Strength, His Un-wavering Love and for His Infinite Wisdom. I found all of this in Ecclesiastes 3:1-9.
“To everything there is a season, and A time to every purpose under the heaven:
A time to be born and A time to die; A time to plant, and A time to pluck up that which is planted;
A time to kill, and A time to heal; A time to break down, and A time to build up;
A time to weep, and A time to laugh; A time to mourn, and A time to dance;
A time to cast away stones and A time to gather stones together;
A time to embrace, and A time to refrain from embracing;
A time to get, and A time to lose; A time to keep and A time to cast away;
A time rend, and A time to sew; A time to keep silence, and A time to speak;
A time to love, and A time to hate; A time of war and A time of peace!

This scripture profoundly displays how God predetermined the events of life. As it has proven with my life, it has truly been one big circle. As the Lord continues to help me to keep my right mind about myself when I am faced with difficult life situations that are continuously changing yet remaining the same no matter how beautiful or complex they are. I must say that whatever state I am in at this moment in time, I am committed to settle in and savor every minute from this point forward to embrace what God predetermine for my life seasons that I have left no matter who does not like or has a problem with it!~

It is Time that I am LOVED for who I am not for what I do
It is Time that I am APPRECIATED and not taken for granted
It is Time that I am CELEBRATED and not tolerated
It is Time my Talents are GREATLY VALUED by those who seek them
It is Time that I position myself to be among GIVERS instead of takers
It is Time I surround myself by those who RECOGNIZE my worth without sapping the life out of me
It is Time that I plant myself among ENCOURAGING & POSITIVE friends & family instead of being around those who give out negative and disheartening put-downs
It is Time that the Quality of Love I Unselfishly Gives to so many is UNSELFISHLY RETURNED unto me
This is My Time and This is My Life!

The Circle of Life ~ There Is Nothing New Under The Sun!

Author of Battle Scars of Emotions~
Divine Healing from the Scars of Life

A Mother’s Love!

When I think of Mother’s Day, I can not help but to think of my own mother. It has been 35 years since I last my eyes upon her. It was the most beautiful, breathing sight I have ever seen. It was as though I had walked into a room where an angel was laying with a glow around her like no other! I knew then that her soul was in the perfect place of peace, the place where we call heaven. The smile that was on her face and the halo that shined so brightly around her head assured me that she was in the presence of the Lord.

What a wonderful place to be, I cried. She endured so much pain and sorrow on this earth, but her face showed me of the beautiful place of serenity that she had come upon and I had no need to be sad or cry because all of her worries was over. At the age of 48 My Dearest Mother Ruth earthly life had come to an abrupt end as she took her final breath.

Words can not express how much I deeply miss her and wish that she was still here with me each and every day. Life can be so unfair at times especially for a 24 year old young adult who’s womanhood was just getting started and needing the care and advice from her own mother. Nevertheless, life goes on and God has a plan for each one of our lives no matter how long or short the stay. The most important thing is what we do with the time we are allotted. Everyone is given the same twenty-four hours in a day and what we choose to do with it is totally and completely up to us.

I Thank God Daily for My Mother and the special times we shared during her short stay here. Looking back and wishing that I had spent more time with her and doing more of the things we love to do together. However, the precious gift of herself she so unselfishly gave me and my siblings made me feel as though I was an only child. But only God knows how to fill the voids in ones life by sending others with helping hands, words of encouragements, hugs and expressions of Love on those difficult and unbearable days. Nothing or no one could or would ever take the place of a Mother’s Love, but only God know how to embrace a daughter’s hurting heart.

The one thing that I can truly share, is that if you are Blessed to still have your Mother with you, Embrace Her Essence ever so thigh! Remind her daily of the love you have for her and how precious she is. Do fun things together and don’t forget to laugh at the silly things, “Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff,” because you will never know what day will be her last. Talk, communicate and get to know and understand her more. My father taught me that communication and understanding are two of the greatest things in the world, remember, she deserves the very best you have to offer her in every possible way.

Before closing, I would like to share one of my mother’s favorite songs I use to hear her sing around the house during this time of the year.

M for the Many things She gave me

O means only that she’s growing Old

T is for the many Tears she shed for me

H is for her Heart of purest Gold

E is for the Everlasting Love she gave me

R means that she’s Right and Right she’ll always be

Put them all together–they spells MOTHER–a word that means the World to Me!

Happy Mother’s Day to All The Special Mother’s!

Author of Battle Scars of Emotions~
Divine Healing from the Scars of Life


Seven months ago almost to the day, I woke up with the word perplexed on my mind. Why on earth would I have such a word on my mind? After all the anticipation of a beautiful vacation visiting my grand baby in Chicago was the only thing I allowed to consume my mind with such beautiful thoughts of seeing her and spending much-needed precious moments together. However so, perplexed, I was.

Yes perplexed, knowing that I was awaken with such a word on my mind the eve of what was supposed to be the best three-weeks vacation ever! Yes, I was preparing for the renewal retreat of a refreshing me, Body Mind and Aw, my Soul! However true, my mind would not release this annoying word. So straight to the my Bible I ran for the answer.  What I found was so appropriate as it spoke about the “Trials Abound In the Ministry” in 2 Corinthians 4:8-10 & 16: “We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; Persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed; Always bearing about in the body the dying of the Lord Jesus, that the life also of Jesus might be made manifest in body.” “For which cause we faint not; but though our outward man perish, yet the inward man is renewed day by day.” Wow! 

What an Awakening! God is so amazing on how He will lead a perplexed individual to the right words at the right time to sooth a shattered soul! This scripture made me realized something of great importance. However true, I just had a notion to search out my friend Webster as well and see what  he had to say about such a word that started my day on this crazy path. Webster describes Perplex: “To disturb mentally; CONFUSED” Perplexed: “Filled with uncertainty; PUZZLED: 2) Full of  difficulty; COMPLICATED.” In other words, “To make unable to grasp something clearly or to think logically and decisively about something.” Wow, yet again! In the natural Webster literally described exactly how I was feeling with each and every word listed, that moment in time.

Needless to say, I was truly ready for my self-imposed emotional, mental, spiritual and physical get-a-way from the world as I knew it. I needed a refresh outlook on everything around me, husband, check; son, check; daughter, check; and Aw church members, so call friends and yes my ministry, check; Oh well on these, let’s do a double-check, just in case! “Cause, Lawdy– Those Chuch Folks going to be the death of my soul yet!” A line from a play I am in the process of writing. I have learned that some times things hurt so bad you have to laugh to keep from crying.

However true, before I can get to the annual conference to where me and my ministry would be analyzed and examined to determined if I am a candidate to represent the connectional denominational church or better yet to remain on trial in which I am a member (a complicated process to assure that my character passes), for yet another year. Nevertheless, unbeknown to me, my fate was determined weeks before my arrival.  So there I stood In the present of  many. The words that resonated throughout the room I can still hear as though I was  standing in the same place today. Those piercing words, “Rev. Jones, We just don’t know what to do with you, after all you have been on trial for so long we just don’t have any place for you to go but back to your local church!” Wow, Perplexed is right! As though I was in a Charlie Brown movie, seeing the mouth moving but all I was really hearing was, wa-wa-wa-not believing my ears!

Back to the profound scripture. It revealed an awesome jewel of awareness that even though I have been casted out of the place I thought I belonged to, and where I was loyal in doing ministry, in hope to one day pastor a church. Instead, I was deeply burden with the weight of perplexity and left the conference with these crazy words resonating in my ears, “the committee no longer knows what to do with you since I have been on trial for so long.” I took that as a point to prove  that I was no longer good enough to be a candidate whom they would consider for pastor-ship nor did I have what it took to remain on trial, better yet to represent the connectional church on such a level. It seem as though my talents was only good enough to be used for the local church. Perplexed is Right!

What I thought was a direct low blow to my loyalty, integrity, character, and yes what I represented in my ministry. Not to mention overcoming such betrayal, back stabbing, and outright deception that hid itself behind the many masks disguised as friends or from people, of all places the church in whom a lot of trust has been placed. Needless to say was nothing compared to the pain of the embarrassment and the manner things were handled together with the piercing and painful words I could not erase from my mind.

Oh How Awesome it is to Rest in The Bosom of God~He will fight All of your Battles! “Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for Him: fret not thyself because of Him who prospered in His way, because of the man who bringeth wicked devices to pass. Cease from anger, and forsake wrath; fret not thyself in any wise to do evil (Psalms 37:7-8).” Only God knows your heart and what you are thinking. Only God can give you a clean heart as he teaches you to forgive your friends and foes alike. Only God have a way of protecting you from the very things your enemies uses  to come against you. Only God can and will strengthen you in and at your very point of weakness, and protect you from the enemy’s line of fire.

Life Lessons Straight From This Scripture:  
I was troubled on every side, yet I was not distressed enough to give up on what I knew God had ordained in me regardless to what everyone else may say or think.  I was perplexed, but I was not in despair, that is to lose all hope to completely walk away from the Church because I know the Church lives inside of me.   I was persecuted by men, but my God promised to never leave nor forsake me.  I was cast down from where I thought God wanted me and from where I thought I belonged. I am not, by no means destroyed and realized that my destiny is not in the confinement of four walls.  I became faint for a brief moment and had to get myself together in my temporary point of weakness, yet the Inward wo-man is renewed day by day!

To God Be The Glory!

Author of Battle Scars of Emotions~
Divine Healing from the Scars of Life

The Power of Love

February has always been known as the month of Love! This is the one time of year that society tells us that we are to shower our husbands, wives, soul-mates, boyfriends, girlfriends, and or our significant others with gifts that represents the love we have for one another. This is the one time during the year that it is okay to openly express that love is in the air.

So what happens when the candles are blown out, the dinner has been consumed, the flowers has withered, the chocolate eaten or hidden in the refrigerator for a later time and the fine jewelry has safely been stored away. Is the thrill of this special day gone already and back to the rut and rat race of love as we know it. Was it just for show only or is real love still lingering behind, nice and steady, standing strong  and firmly rooted in communication, compassion and compromise?

As I think back about my younger personal experiences of relationships disguise as or hid behind the puffed up word Love, they have been very painful and selfish thoughts that I allowed others to impose upon me. I was always willing to give, never on the receiving end as the way God intended for love to be as it relates to how we are to treat, be treated, and love one another. Hindsight, if Love (being an action word) is to be acted upon as it is out lined in what is called the Love chapter in the Bible, (1 Corinthians 13:1-13), then let brotherly love rule and reign throughout while discrimination, selfishness, self-centeredness and hatred cease!

” Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity (love), I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal. 2) And though I have the gif of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have  all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity (Love), I am nothing. 3) And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profited me nothing. 4) Charity (Love) sufferers long, and is kind; charity (love) envies not; charity (love) vaunted not itself, is not puffed up, 5) Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeks not her own, is not easily provoked, think not evil; 6) rejoice not in iniquity, but rejoice in the truth; 7) Bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 8) Charity (Love) never fails; but whether there be prophecies, they shall fail; whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whether there be knowledge, it shall vanish away. 9) Fo we know in part, and we prophesy in part. 10) But when that which is perfect is come, then that which is in part shall be done away. 11) When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I though as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things. 12) For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known. 13) And now abides faith, hope, charity (love), these three; but the greatest of these is charity (Love)!” 

Author of Battle Scars of Emotions~
Divine Healing from the Scars of Life

Out of the Mouths of Babes~My Heart Rejoice!

Waking up with my grand-nephew on my mind because it was his seventh birthday, who also happens to be my god son! He brings so much joy and laughter to my heart. One of God’s divine plans of choosing the right day to be his special day as well. Not just for him but for the joy he brings to others through his unique personality by simply being who he is. Just recently he and his brother spent the weekend with me over the New Year’s holiday, and that was when I realizes that this little fellow was a funny character. However, not to my surprise because of who his grandfather is, one of my five brothers and his mother whom both keeps me laughing when my spirits are down and in stitches when we are at family gatherings.

As I was going throughout my busy day from running to the doctor’s office, to and from various sites to get in on free income tax filing and the arduous task of grocery shopping with an impatient and restless husband (talking about shopping with child in the shell of an adult), needless to say I was completely drained once I made it home. Putting away the groceries getting something to eat and checking both the mail and emails, were overwhelming in its self. Needless to say, time got away from me and I forgot to call my babe to wish him a happy birthday and headed straight to my bed. Forget the fact that it will soon be time to shower and get tucked in for the night, I was drained and could not go another step!

Suddenly I was awaken, yes at 11:55 p.m. by my beautiful niece reminding me that I had forgotten to call my babe and did not respond to her text, ” of course not, because I was asleep, too tired for words”! By all means, I did not say it quite that way to my niece who is like a daughter who understands her auntie very well. However, the profound blessing I received when I spoke to my nephew who calls me “auntie-godmama”, was too much for words and left me in a state of reflection after hanging up from me, that I had to call his right mother back to finish the conversation and to wish her Happy Birthday as well since the midnight chime had rung and it was now her special day.

This little gift from God, when I asked him what did he want me to give him for his birthday, his respond was so unselfish and non-concerning. He did not run off a list of expensive things or gifts, big-ticket items or a lot of  things that did not make any sense. He just simply said that I don’t have anything in mind. Wow! Isn’t it beautiful to know that a simple Happy Birthday Wish was all that was needed to make a seven-year old child content and to know that you really did care. Not all of the commercial things were needed that we adults have placed around our children and in their minds to make them think that a birthday (and other holidays) only matters with gifts, money, expensive things, stuff and such, instead of the simple gift of genuine Love and a great big telephone hug. How sad in subtle ways we are guilty of teaching our children that simple acts of kindness of respect and love in this day in time is not acceptable or is not good enough anymore.

I found myself pondering upon this scripture found in Mark 13:16: “And they brought young children to him, that he should touch them: and his disciples rebuked those that brought them. But when Jesus saw it, he was much displeased, and said unto them, Suffer the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is the kingdom of God. Verily I say unto you, Whosoever shall not receive the kingdom of God as a little child, he shall not enter therein. And He took them up in His arms, put His hand upon them, and Blessed them.”

Lesson: When we begin to look at life from the innocent eyes and out of the mouths of children, it would be a better world to live in!

Author of Battle Scars of Emotions~
Divine Healing from the Scars of Life

Angels Unawares

Upon leaving a restaurant my husband and I frequent, I received a blessing of a life time from a beautiful elderly woman whom I never met nor saw before. She got my attention by waving at me to tell me how much she admired my hair.  I could not help but notice this charming small frame elderly lady sitting alone near the exit waiting for who appeared to be her daughter at the cash register.  As I was approaching her with a smile, she returned it with in a soft sweet voice,  “your hair is beautiful”!

Once I got closer to her she repeated herself a little louder, yet still soft, ” you really do have beautiful hair, it is so pretty”, she said! I responded with a humble thank you and proceeded to let her know how much I really admired her beautiful green and pink country plaid jacket.  I could not help but notice that she was dressed just like her daughter, however she did have on a stunning fuchsia applique` cap that accented her entire outfit.

In the mean while, my husband recognized he knew the daughter of this beautiful woman. He could not help himself by interrupting our conversation and asking of her age. Her hearing was obviously a little faint and her daughter answered from the register before she got the opportunity to respond, “she is 103 years old”, we both were amazed needless to say! My Husband leaned over to her and repeated her age looking into her face, and she replied with, a simple yes!

I was deeply humbled and flattered to have received such a compliment from a 103 years old woman sitting in front of me with such grace and style.  Who would have thought she would have taken notice of me at such an age?  She sat with great poise and dignity and when she stood up, she stood tall, walked straight without a cane, or assistance aside from a little guidance stepping down a step.  How remarkable!

Before departing our ways, she reached to give me a hug and while she embraced me, she whispered in my ears, “if I don’t ever see you again~I will see you in heaven.” Wow! As my eyes begin to tear up, I said to her that “if you should get to heaven before I do, please tell my mother that I will be seeing her soon.  She will know you by the light shining from your halo!”

I could not help but to sit awhile before allowing my husband to drive away to gather my thought and just savor this precious moment. My mind drifted off to the amazement of the most stunning iridescent shimmer of white and silver, fine, long plated, pinned up hair as a halo around her head that peaked from underneath her stunning hat.

As God would have it, the scripture that came to mind was Hebrews 13:1-2, “Let brotherly Love continue. Be not afraid to entertain strangers; for thereby some have entertained angels unawares.” Lesson: Be careful how you treat others you will never know the Impact or the Blessings they will leave upon your life!

“For the Battle is Not Yours~It is the Lord’s!”

Author of Battle Scars of Emotions~
Divine Healing from the Scars of Life